Not everyone deserves to know your story.

How strong are you to share your story with those around you! It takes a certain amount of vulnerability to open up and be honest about how shit things have been or how challenging certain circumstances have become. I know from personal experience that at times the cost of opening up is a giant dose of judgement and “oh don’t think or feel like that you’re overthinking the issue!”

In a perfect world we would all understand each other at the same level of perception, we’d just get it. Most of the time we’re coming from a good place and we mean well even if that means admitting that we’re struggling and that things aren’t working. You have been through a lot and you deserve to share your story with someone who is willing to listen with the right amount of empathy and without judgement. 

With that said, be mindful of who you open up to about the vulnerable and sensitive issues or experiences you have had. When we refer to oriental medicine for guidance, we consider the small intestine, an organ belonging to the fire element; we are encouraged to discern between what is “pure” and “impure” basically bringing on board a healthy discriminative mindset with a capacity to be clear on our judgements and decision making when it comes to sharing our sensitive stories. 

There are many reasons someone may not be the best person to open up to and I guess sometimes we learn that from the school of hard knocks. All this is not to create paranoia, but to encourage healthy boundaries, it is a wonderful gift to share our experiences with those around us, but not everyone deserves that gift. In times of hardship we can become ambivalent and confused, unsure of who to turn to for guidance and support, this self-doubt and frustration can lead us to sharing more than we meant to with people who aren’t necessarily listening for the right reasons or from the right place. The last thing we need in these situations is to walk away from a conversation feeling criticised, put down or made out to be naive and gullible. 

We are only human, we make mistakes, we hurt, we cry, we get angry, we get upset, sometimes we yell and scream, we do not live our lives purely out of a “how to do life” manual; so it’s ok that you’ve handled your personal situation in the way you have, the way you knew how, it’s ok if you could have handled it better, you grow from your mistakes and your behaviour is not you. Hold that close to your heart and remember that when you choose who to share your story with.

When we are going through troublesome situations or periods in our life, having someone to listen and understand is not to be underestimated. Opening up to the right person can help us receive and assimilate information beneficial to our circumstances, clear up any physical, mental or spiritual confusion and navigate the way to make clear choices while ensuring we wisely make those good judgment calls where and when needed. After all, I guess all we really want at the end of the day is to feel safe with that someone we open up to, someone who can hold that space for us and for that little while and be our sense of home where we can heal and grow and they can too. 

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